Heard from the doctor last night. Good news, but mysterious.
The "hot spots" that showed up on my scan are apparently injuries that are healing. My rib, that one can be explained by an exuberant birthday hug from my robust boy. He doesn't realize that his 50 year old mother is getting a little more fragile, no harm intended.
But the other, my back...the doctor asked me if I fell. I did not. Do you think he suspects that Paul beats me and I'm not saying? Or maybe I drink a lot and blacked out? Don't know. But I can't explain that one to anybody.
So that is a good thing.
This morning I find that I feel sad. Deep, tender sorrow. For all my loved ones for whom life is difficult and tricky. For all of you who are suffering and hurt. I can't fix much, but I'd give my right leg, willingly, if it meant I could.
I must find what makes my heart sing. I must. I cannot go on filling my life with meaningless 'values'. If I can add something to my life which I TRULY value, then I think I will be able to take the trade off - the hours I spend each day doing things that are worthless to me, but put the food on my table, and roof over my head.
I have to look at each minute of how I spend my time. Then cull the most unnecessary tasks, and replace those with creativity. With something that has value to me. I have to work this out. Suggestions anyone?
Peace and healing to all of you -
1 comment:
Your art Elf, paint some more...add projects to paint this for that person after going to an unfinished wood store. What d'ya think? The gifts would be one of a kind, and totally priceless. Plus, not only would you value your work and time painting-the gift would be to someone you value.
~A thought, Paige
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